Poor Bike

Hah hah, so I was riding up Guadalupe St. today thinking of buttercups and gumdrops when I saw a most peculiar flyer. Hm, I thought, THAT bike looks exactly like THIS bike I 'procured' from some knucklehead who left it laying around outside in some grass. Really, I didn't think that you would put flyers up! It's a DECENT bike but only because of the skull. Yea, I left the skull flag on there but I painted over the lightning bolt. It's now an ewok. Skull. An ewok skull. I also don't consider myself a thief, though I thank you for the compliment. At least I'm SOMETHING. Up until this point I hadn't really managed to be anything at all. I also replaced the 20" rims with 21" inch rims because it looks a LOT cooler. Not only that but it makes your flyers TOTALLY useless considering, you know... the rims are 21" now. I just thought of that. Neat. I wear a helmet too. A really, really, expensive helmet that comes with life insurance and a phoenix down. Thanks a lot buddy, you'll never catch me afterall. You know that, right? You'll never see this bike again. I'll ride some other bike- like my tricked out Schwinn with chrome fenders and a basket I totally lifted from this vacant art chick. Later, dude.

Oh, did I mention I don't even like bikes?

- Boris